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"The Times", campaigning for "The United Kingdom of America"
Ok, if anyone read "The Times" on Saturday 14th February 2006, they will have noticed what I noticed. If you didn't you can find the article here: http://driving.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,22749-1984593,00.html
An article was entitled: "Goodbye to the 4x4 as America discovers small is beautiful"
WHAT THE HELL?
That's the most absurd statement anyone could ever make, ever. It's even more stupid than saying that a thousand monkeys sitting at a thousand typewriters typing for infinite years could produce the entire works of Shakespeare. Think about it logically. If you do, you'll realise that your theory of monkeys being anything other than stupid is raped:
1) Monkeys die. They don't live for infinite.
2) Monkeys get tired
3) Monkeys get arthritis
8) Monkeys bite their fingers off when they have to type too much
10) I've just bitten my finger off. Now there's blood everywhere. I blame James Blunt, everything is his fault.
4) Who the hell cares?
5) Why Shakespeare? Why? Seriously? WHY? WHY IS IT ALWAYS SHAKESPEARE? DROP SHAKESPEARE FOR CHRISTS SAKE. He's not even alive any more, that's how much he sucks.
But anyway, just because America has finally realised that there is something in cars that don't guzzle fuel like an automated fuel guzzling machine, doesn't mean that the 4x4 is going to go 'bye bye'. America doesn't have much use for 4x4s in their cities, on their roads, in the dry, dusty conditions. In the UK however, loads of people own 4x4s because they need them when they get stuck in the mud, or for farm work, or simply for getting up freakin' hills. 4 x 4s are needed by a lot of people in the UK, and just because America is going to start buying smaller cars, doesn't mean that all farmers are going to ditch their land rovers and go and buy a Honda Jazz to pull their horse-boxes.
I hate The Times for this, I used to think they were alright, you know, like that kid in the playground who sits in the corner and doesn't bother anyone, he's a bit of a jerk, but he's alright, now and then he's picked on... but this time that kid has crossed the line and he needs to be given the beating of his life, I suggest first we chase him, then punch him, kick him, and throw stones at him until he wets his pants. Then we can call him "wet pants" for the rest of the year, and he'll never live it down, and he'll probably kill himself when he's twenty because he can't get a job because he keeps wetting his pants. Haha.
The Times has tried to burn the British Empire, they've tried to make us out to be copycats, well I say we burn the times.
This ought to show them...
It's about Time the Times let us know who they were with, are the British, or are they gay? And by gay I mean not British.
And just because I hate America, I think we should burn them too..here's what we'll do, but keep it a secret because if they find out they might not bother doing anything about it and carry on reading to children... we should get some planes, yeah, big ones, like the ones they have in movies, right, and fly them, over the sea from Iraq.., and, yeah you know, fly them in to something, something big, something like the Twin Towers...what do you think we should fly them in to? MC DONALDS? WHAT THE HELL? GET OUT, JUST LEAVE, INFACT, WRITE YOUR NAME ON NEXT WEEKS SUICIDE BOMBING ROTA... How about you? The Twin Towers? Yeah that's a good idea..we'll do that.
And another thing that pisses me off, America only calls themselves the "United States" so that they get more capitals on their abbreviation than the UK, well you know what?
I might even create my own country to put America in their place; blow me..."The United Front Of Solon's Empire Created By Solon For Solon To Establish Rule Over Lesser Countries With Less Abbreviations Than The United Front Of Solon's Empire, Formally Known As 'Soland'"
or, for short: "TUFOSECBSFSTEROLCWLATTUFOSEFKAS"
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