|
|
|
|
Go..Away..
Ever sat down in a restaurant and heard the fat guy on the table next to you munching on his wife? Or steak? That annoying slobbery sound of slob, a jaw moving up and down; the movement it is now so accustomed to, and the spit swirling about his oversized tongue. You wanna punch his chubby little light bulb eyes out don't you? DON'T YOU?
Yes, you do, because I told you you do, and when I tell you you want to do something you will damn well do it young man. Or woman. I said man first because men are better. Ahaha, zing.
Not that I'm sexist, I don't think that a woman's place is in the home. It's more specific than that. A woman's place is in the kitchen, over the stove, cooking my wild boar for later consumption with my deer hunting, alcohol fueled buddies. And being fueled by alcohol is more expensive than you might think; you get so drunk you can't remember if you filled up or not...so you fill up again...and again...and again...and then you pass out, and when you wake up you have to fill up again. Sometimes the cycle gets broken by the pump running out, and that is when you go to the parties with wild boar.
Aww he's so cute, he's chewing wood... he thinks he's a dog. Bad move sucker, people eat dogs too... well some people in foodly challenged countries, probably... I don't really know. Seriously, eating dogs? Where do you get off? Fornicating with kittens? Sickos.
I can't even remember where this article was going. I think it was about deprivation... sleep deprivation. It's a bit like Bond James Bond but with more style and less James Bond and chinese midgits with razor sharp hats that are actually frisbees. Who thought of that? I'll tell you who thought of that. It was me, just now. I thought of it, then wrote it down.
So yeah, sleep deprivation..
They say that sleep deprivation is the enema of the soul. Whatever that means. I think it's some sort of sea urchin, but that aside, sleep deprivation is the enema of the soul. Apparently if you don't sleep for nearing 70 hours you start to hallucinate. I wasn't sure if mine was an hallucination...I made a website about wild boar...but after some sleep I discovered that I actually did make a website, featuring a wild boar. Wild boar... why are they wild? There's a lot of tame boar I bet, I bet they're very friendly, like pigs. Except pigs aren't friendly at all. I met one once... it squealed at me. You know, not all pigs are like Piglet from Winnie the Pooh. Pooh? Why Pooh? Seriously, naming your main character after feces. Haha. Poo. Seriously, pigs squeal and ram you with their heads. They have surprisingly hard heads. As do badgers. Badgers are responsible for totaling a lot of cars, and I don't mean they do maths.
Good night ladies and gentlemen.
Actually I'm going to get some food, I'm a bit McHungry.
---------
Home
bravenet.com