Why America Sucks, And Britain Owns

Reasons Why America Sucks.

America, land of the great, like George Bush. He's so smart he managed to outsmart an assassination attempt by pretzel.

America pays its president $400,000 a year, to read to school children, not react to major events (twin towers) and play golf.

America is a nation of burgers.

America has 50 or so states, no one really cares. Who the hell splits a country into 50 different areas, and gives those areas different laws, that's like having 50 different countries, with no immigration laws. Then, people can commit crimes, and cross the state boundary. Once they are there they can't be touched. Does anyone else see how stupid this is?

American's call fuel "gas". If you're going to call it gas, call it gasoline. It's not gas, gas is a vapour, and you are not filling your cars with some sort of vapour, its a liquid. Dumb asses.

 

Why Britain Rules.

We invented all the good sports, like slander.

We invented English, the best language in the world.

We invented America, they are the ones who screwed it up.

We have, oh wait, no we don't, the NHS sucks, but forget about that.

We invented farming.

We aren't arrogant, not one bit, it's just that everyone else sucks.

We invented the Beatles, and other good things. Shakespeare kind of ruins it though. Damn him.

We are the Champions, my friends. We're good at rugby, sometimes, and we won the World Cup once. Take that America.

 

If you think America is better than England, you are wrong. Why not complain so I can ignore you.